Monday, August 16, 2010

The "Break Up Getting Back Together" Cycle

Has your relationship just ended in a break up? Need tips on getting back together?

It’s a fact that as we go through our lives and date, we tend to get involved in the cycle of what I call “break up getting back together”. One day, something insignificant happens and before you know it, you break up and then you obsess over getting back together. It happens to millions of people every single day.

Has this ever happened to you before? Somehow, you end up in a fight with someone you love over something that had nothing to do with anything and before you can blink, the relationship is over. For example, you ask your boyfriend to stop by the store and pick up some bread. He says “Sure” but two hours later, he strolls in, without the bread and you go off! You start yelling at him about how he never remembers to do anything you ask him to do and he yells back that it’s just bread – he will go get it later. You yell back “That’s not the point, I wanted it now”. The argument escalates out of control – over a stupid loaf of bread – and all of a sudden you are broken up.

This cycle of “break up getting back together” happens every single day around the world. When the argument has ended (usually with someone storming out), you wonder what the heck happened and how did you end up breaking up over something as stupid as a loaf of bread! Or some other trivial thing that really means nothing!

If you really want to get your ex back, you need to stop playing the victim and get down to work. Do you really want to break up with someone over something trivial? Most people would agree that they don’t want to end a relationship over something so stupid.

READ THE REST OF THE ARTICLE ON Break Up Getting Back Together.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Relationship Break Ups - When You Decide To Break Up Let Your Soon To Be Ex Know First

When you decide to break up with the person that you have been dating, common sense says that you should always tell him or her FIRST - not all of your friends.  Remember that if you tell your friends first, word may get back to your partner before you have a chance to break the news.  Your partner deserves to be told you want to break up before anyone else in your circle of friends. 

It's understandable that you would discuss the problems you have in a relationship with your friends.  Many times your friends have been through the same thing at some point and they can have some good advice for you.  But you should not tell them that you are going to break up with your partner before you break the news to that person first.

When you do actually decide to tell your partner you want to part ways, put some thought into when and where you are going to do it.  If your soon to be ex partner is going to be devastated, try to break the news on a Friday so that he or she has all weekend to recover.  But if you don't think your soon to be ex really won't care, then at the very least do it after work.

There is never a perfect time to break up with someone and end a relationship.  The person you have been dating may be totally shocked or it may be a relief.  Either way, there is going to be some sadness involved for both of you.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Learn The Art Of Sexy Kissing And Stop Relationship Break Ups

If you and your lover have gotten in a rut and you are afraid that he is going to break up with you, you need to take some steps to put the sexy back in your relationship. It doesn't have to be hard and it will be quite pleasurable.


Kissing is one way to keep the intimacy alive in your relationships. Learn how to give your guy a knock-his-socks-off kiss by using these sexy kissing secrets by Wiliam Cane, author of "The Art Of Kissing."

Put your arms around his neck, press your body close to his, and begin with a sweet kiss on the lips. Lean back, give him a teasing smile, then move in again, adding a little tongue, nibbling on his lower lip (guys love this!) and running your hands through his hair. Wait for him to be for more. Repeat.

Find out more about "The Art Of Kissing".

Relationship Break Ups - How To Overcome A Relationship Break Up

Unless you are living under a rock and don't know a single person on the planet, you will experience some sort of painful loss at some point, overcoming a relationship break up is one of those painful loses.  Sometimes the pain is so intense and the heartbreak is so terrible that it can seem like you will never laugh or love again when you are in the middle of a breakup. Just remember, that no matter how impossible it seems at this moment, you will laugh and love again, as long as you allow yourself to do so.

The sad fact is that many of us don't know how to deal with the hurt and we shut down.  Many people lock themselves in their house or apartment and don't emerge for months.  They don't clean house, shop for groceries, shower, etc.  This is not completely unusual behavior and it's not a problem as long as it's only temporary, but some people just don't snap out of it and they live the rest of their lives not trusting or loving anyone again... and that is a true shame.

When you deeply love someone it's impossible to believe that you could ever love anyone again, especially the first time you fall in love. But, as you grow older and have more experiences you'll learn that you can love many people throughout your lifetime and while no two relationships will be exactly the same, they can all be very fulfilling and you can feel deep love in each one.

When it comes to finding the best way to move through the heartache of a broken relationship it's best to remember that you have (or can have with some practice) complete control over your thoughts. You can teach yourself to stop wallowing in the pain and force yourself to think more positively about the future. When you learn to do this you will find that you will move on so much more quickly after a painful situation.

If this sounds dumb to you, think of it like this: if you cut yourself and a scab forms when does the cut hurt the most? When you are ignoring it and going about your daily life or when you are sitting looking at it and picking at the scab? Sure, it might be somewhat painful all the time but when you focus on it you are focusing on the pain and of course, if you pay attention to it you'll feel it more. Same concept with a broken relationship.

So, try mind over matter yourself next time you're overcoming a relationship break up. Don't dwell on the pain but focus on happy thoughts and you'll see that you can move on a little more quickly.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Tips For Healing A Broken Heart From Love

When it comes to healing a broken heart from love the number one thing you have to keep in mind is that it will take time. I know, this is the last thing you want to hear, no one wants to stay in pain any longer than they have to. While it will take time to move on and feel better, there are some things you can do to make things go a little easier.

Use these tips to get over it and move on:

1. First of all, don't sit back and wait for your hurt to heal, be proactive. Take your life by the reigns, take control and make some changes. What is it that you've been putting on the back burner? A new job, vacation, a new look? Whatever it is, do it. It will make you feel like a new person, which will help you move on a little more quickly.

2. Only allow yourself a limited amount of 'wallowing' time. Sure, most people will mope around for a few days, or even a week, but that's it. Don't hide from the world. You may not be ready to start dating, and you probably shouldn't, but that doesn't mean you can't hang out with your friends and just start moving on with your life, even if it's only baby steps.

3. While you don't want to wallow in a sea of 'what if's' (see step 2) it is a good idea to spend some time trying to figure out what went wrong. Not so you can get your ex back, but so you can hopefully avoid making the same mistakes the next time around...and make no mistake, if you allow it, there will be a next time and another love.

The end of a relationship with someone you love is painful, to anyone currently going through it that will probably sound like a huge understatement. But if you go about it the right way you can help speed the healing process along a little bit and that's where these healing a broken heart from love tips can come in handy.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Dealing With Break Up Causes Break Up Pain - How To Deal With A Painful Break Up

Dealing with break up causes break up pain. I don’t care how long you were involved in a relationship with your partner, dealing with a break up is going to be painful. There is just no way around it. The longer you were with this person, the more it will hurt.

Sometimes it may take awhile for the break up pain to really hit you and when it does, it is crippling. When a relationship ends, dealing with break up pain is imperative because it is like a death and you have to grieve the loss of this relationship. You have to accept that the relationship is over and be able to move on. When a break up occurs and you have to find a way to deal with a broken intimate relationship, it is up to you to find a reason to go on.

Some people are so wracked by break up pain that they can’t eat, take a shower or even get out of bed. It may seem that is impossible to go on after the relationship has ended. The fear and misery of being alone after a relationship breakup is debilitating. People in this position don’t know who to turn to and often times cannot even express the depths of their grief. Dealing with break up pain all by yourself is not possible in a lot of cases. It makes sense to get professional help when the pain of a breakup is so severe that you don’t think you can go on.

Why do so many people have trouble dealing with break up pain? The reason is that when a break up happens, often times the person being broken up with didn’t see it coming. They didn’t realize that a break up was imminent and they are completely shocked and dismayed. It can be hard to believe that you are not the only person to ever experience this kind of pain and grief.

But the bottom line is that the longer you dwell on the lost relationship, the worse the break up pain will be. Continuing to obsess over the loss of your lover won’t make these feelings go away and will in fact only make the situation worse. You have to be able to move on and put these feelings behind you. Unless you can do this, you will never be able to find someone new to love. While it seems impossible at this point, you might even find someone that actually fits you better and who you love even more than your ex.

How To Get Over Break Up Pain
  • - Get out of the house  
  • - Spend time with family and friends that are supportive  
  • - Take up a new hobby  
  • - Exercise to release endorphins  
  • - Don’t dwell on your lost love  
  • - Focus on the good things in your life
Your best friends can be great confidants. Chances are they have been through a bad break up or two in their lives. Many times they can be a great source of comfort and can help you in dealing with break up pain. Anyone that isn’t supportive of you during this time needs to be dumped, at least for right now. You don’t need anyone negative in your life at this point in time.

You can get through this and deal with break up pain successfully. Get tips on dealing with the loss of your love and find out how to move on and find someone new with The Magic of Making Up. This book isn’t just about getting your ex back. Sometimes it’s better to let your ex go and find someone new to love. This book can give you tips on how to do that and how to find someone even better.

Avoiding A Love Break Up - Signs Your Partner Wants To Break Up

Anyone in a relationship that has suffered through a love break up knows how extremely painful it is. Usually a love break up comes as a complete shock at first and then when you look back at the relationship you realize that had you been paying attention you would have noticed the signs that a guaranteed break up was headed your way.

There are always signs that a break up is imminent, you just have to know what to look for and be aware that if your partner is not happy, he or she will break up with you. What many people don’t know is that the guaranteed signs of a break up that you missed can also assist you in figuring out how to get your ex back after a split.

So, what are the guaranteed signs of a break up that you need to look for?

Lack of physical contact. Before a love break up occurs, there will usually be a lack of physical contact. While this includes lack of sex it also means that your partner avoids touching you at all. While interest in sex comes and goes, in a good solid relationship the partner’s usually touch one another, hold hands, kiss, etc. When one partner is contemplating a break up, all physical contact will cease.

So, if you notice that your partner refuses to hold your hand, doesn’t kiss you, put an arm around you, etc., a love break up is probably around the corner. This hold true for any sudden changes in behavior that you notice, especially if your partner was formerly very affectionate and now doesn’t want to be any where near you.

Assuming there are nothing going on like the death of someone close, financial difficulties or anything else that could be causing this behavior, you need to address this problem with your partner about what is going on. If you don’t you may have to watch as your partner breaks up with you.

Keep in mind that there could be other reasons for your partner not wanting to touch you or be touched by you. If your partner is lost in thought and you touch them unexpectedly, he or she may move away from you because you startled them. They may also think you are trying to initiate sex and they may not be in the mood right now. This doesn’t mean your partner is trying to break up with you.

It may also be as simple as your partner is sick and doesn’t feel very well. Just because you notice that you partner doesn’t seem to want to be touched right now doesn’t mean you are necessarily headed for a love break up. You will have to watch your partner carefully and determine if this is just a short term thing or is this actually becoming a pattern.

Another clue that you may be headed for a love break up is that you catch your partner lying to you. Even small white lies could be a guaranteed sign of a break up under the right circumstances. Sometimes lies are told to protect your feelings and other times they are told to cover something up.

Your partner’s behavior is a good indicator of how solid your relationship is. Signs like not wanting to touch you or be touched by you, lying and refusing to discuss your future are signs that a love break up is headed your way. If you don’t want the relationship to end, then you need to do something about it. Not sure if these signs are normal or if your relationship is in trouble? Get the help you need to avoid a love break up.
Disclosure: Some of the Links in my Blog Posts are Affiliate Links. If you purchase products after clicking on the links, I will make a commission on the transaction. As most of the people reading this blog will be in the Internet Marketing Business and/or learning about Internet Marketing, you should know how Affiliate Marketing works.